Would You Go On A “Nakation At Sea”?
Most people go on holiday to relax, sip a drink, and maybe fall asleep in a deck chair. But aboard the Sea Serenity, some guests took “letting your hair down” to Olympic levels, letting everything down… including their underwear. Nude cruises, “nakations at sea”, are booming, apparently fueled by people who looked at packing lists and said, “Nah.”
You may be expecting pure chaos: sunscreen mishaps, slippery deck chairs, maybe a conga line that would haunt her forever. Instead, you are greeted by Kat Whitmire, the chipper Bare Necessities cruise organizer who delivered rules with the energy of a kindergarten teacher explaining crayons.
“Remember,” Kat chirped, “no public erections. If something starts… um… rising, think about baseball or jump in cold water.” All the men immediately memorized the pool’s location.
Other rules followed: always sit on a towel (“Your butt is not a coaster”), no mesh or string outfits in the dining room (“No nips, no bits, no butts”), and yes, you still have to wear clothes at dinner, mostly so the waitstaff doesn’t have to balance hot soup next to someone’s liberated anatomy.
The staff stayed fully clothed, a mercy for everyone, and that despite being a nude cruise, plenty of passengers kept their clothes on.
Activities were the same as any cruise: karaoke, trivia, dance classes…but no limbo (for obvious reasons)! Nobody wants those memories for a lifetime!
By the time the ship glided into the postcard-perfect Bay of Kotor, Melissa realized the truth: nude cruises weren’t wild, they were basically regular cruises, just with fewer tan lines and a much higher demand for towels.
Doug O’Brien
