DJ Wakes Up BLIND
You think you’ve had a bad Monday morning? Think again. One radio veteran shared a story from his early days that will make your skin crawl and your sides hurt from laughing. This isn’t just a “case of the Mondays”, it’s a horror story with a hilarious, eye-popping twist.
Broke, Busted, and Blind
Picture this: A young, aspiring radio jock, so broke he can’t even afford to keep the water on. We’re talking next-level squalor. To get by, he had a hose running from an outside spigot through his bedroom window. Between his radio gig and a side hustle at a local bar, he was burning the candle at both ends.
One fateful Monday, after a particularly grueling weekend, he woke up and realized something was terribly wrong. He could see out of his left eye, but his right eye was pure darkness. Total blackout. What’s a guy to do? Like any of us would, he figured a little more sleep would fix it. He rolled over, hoping to wake up from what had to be a nightmare.
Hours later, a loud banging at the door jolted him awake. It was his landlord, who had discovered the illegal plumbing situation. As he answered the door, still blind in one eye, the landlord didn’t just notice the hose. He noticed something else.
An Unwanted Bedfellow
“Mike, what’s wrong with you?” the landlord asked, before pointing directly at his face. “What is that on your eye?” Confused, the young DJ mumbled something about waking up blind. “No,” the landlord insisted. “What is ON your eye?”
He finally took a closer look. Perched on his eyelid, fat and happy, was a massive tree roach, the kind that flies, the kind that probably has its own credit score. The giant insect had been feasting on the “crusty crumblies” and eye boogers in the corner of his eye. It had eaten so much of his ocular leftovers that it had passed out in a food coma, completely covering his eyeball and temporarily blinding him. That’s right. The source of his sudden blindness wasn’t a medical emergency. It was a gluttonous cockroach that had turned his face into an all-you-can-eat buffet.
So, next time you’re complaining about your morning, just remember, it could always be worse: you could wake up with a passed-out roach on your eye.
